How often do you think about the quality of your conversations? How often do you find you are telling your story rather than listening to someone else’s?
A few years ago I was lucky to hear someone talk for whom conversations really counted, he had been a hostage negotiator and he used an expression that has stuck with me ever since.
Make every conversation count
I admit there are times I forget such wise advice and find I am rushing to tell rather than listen, but when I do remember the quality of my conversation definitely improves. I really like Susan Scott’s principles for ‘Fierce Conversations’ too:
- Master the courage to interrogate reality
- Come out from behind yourself into the conversation and make it real
- Be here, prepared to be nowhere else
- Tackle your toughest challenge today
- Obey your instincts
- Take responsibility for your emotional wake
- Let silence do the heavy lifting
The conversation is not about the relationship; the conversation is the relationship. Susan Scott.